i know.. its been a while since Ive written. Things have been fairly normal and average around here lately. I did start a new job. I like it. I miss my old one more than I thought possible, but it is more the people and the pets than the work. My current job is a PITA. Very borring at this point. The store is new and hasn't offically opened - even though we have been selling for about a month. Hopefully it will pick up this week with our grand opening. I spend a whole lot of time doing nothing... but hey, I get paid good money to do nothing.
For a while now I have been taking Effexor. This stuff is a total pain in the ass. You have to take it at the same time every day or you get dizzy and nautious. Between jobs I had some major stress and I got some heart palpitations, which I can't blame on th e Effexor, but I want to. Now my hands shake all the time. I think Im going to have to call my doctor and get off this stuff. No, I don't much like thinking what point there is to life, but seriously folks, what point is there to life?? Really the most you can do is make life better for other people, and it seems kinda pointless to be here to make some one else's life better. Yea, good for them, but in the end what does their life amount to?
I do believe in God, and Heaven and the afterlife. but again, what is the point in that. I get to exist for all eternity... doing what? Probably making other people happy. Frankly most people are just all too self absorbed for me to even want to try to make them happy. 9 times out of 10 when someone around you upsets you, its not on purpose, its because they are too involved with their own feelings and needs to care what outcome their actions have. Sadly I like making other people happy. It annoys my friends sometimes cause I will often go out of my way to do something for them. All too often I hear " You didn't need to do that" To which my answer is, if I had to, I wouldn't have. Im also sick and tired of hearing "Are you sure?" when I make an offer to do something. Well DUH! I wouldn't have offered if I didn't want to. *sigh* I know people are just trying to be nice and not take things for granted, but it gets annoying. Guess its just me though. Being weird and all. Its probably my lack of sick kittens to care for. The being needed part is important to me, and all too often I feel superfulous in my own life.
I totally need to get back on the weight loss bandwagon. This is not because I don't feel I fit into society's standard of beauty, but because Im sick and tired of not fitting into chairs and taking a large size shirt, but a 3x pair of pants. Sometimes I wish I was rich and could just have the fat sucked off me. A little off the belly, a lot off the hips and thighs, and some off the back of my arms and i'd be happy. Honestly. I don't need to be a size 4 (although if a Magic Gene came around and offered I'd probably take it) I just don't want to have to wear mumus.
I totally need to get off my duff too. I still have a pretty long todo list. ALthough I haven't written it down. I probably should. Todo lists that are written down have a way of getting done..... ok ok I'll write it down, and I'll start working on it later.
arrrrrrgh.