I dreamed i was driving a new car, and as i was driving down the road I was trying to figure out where all the bells and whistles were in the car. I remember driving over a bridge, and then was out of the car and in what felt like a large train station. there were gates to get through, fancier then regular turnstiles, but close. I was then taken to a staging area where i was waiting for a party (party party not a party of people to come get me)
the other day I dreamed I was in a hostage situation. A guy was holding someone and i was calmly trying to talk him down. He had a knife to the person's throat, and he was boarding on manic. I was doing ok talking to him until a cat wandered near him, and I said lets just ignore the cat, but instead he grabbed it and threatened to kill it. which of course is when I went postal and ended up waking up.
then I dreamed i went into a building and there were way too many little dogs. i was trying to work my way through them, and was moving towards the stairs when a chihuahua jumped at me. Turned out to be a number of puppies, no bigger then a twinkie, and they ended up landing inside my shirt. I pulled three out, but I knew there was four, so i kept searching my shirt for the fourth when i woke up.
I dream a lot about other people's houses.. being inside them, trying to find my way through. often they have a lot of obstacles.. wonder what that is about.. that and amusement rides.. the rides might have something to do with the years of working at an amusement park as a teen.. but still..
1.29.2010
sad
*sigh* I don't quite know what to do. Two people emailed me about my car, the first didn't show. the second went so far as to have the car inspected, and they came up with $800 worth of work that should be done. not quite sure why they think both tie rods needs to be changed when the previous guy said just one, but c'est la vie.. They also recommend some break work.
so i listed it at 3500 thinking it was work 4k but because of the check engine light being on, and the less then ideal seat and steering wheel, I figured 3500 was fair. I was willing to fix the one tie rod. which I thought would be about 300 (wasn't sure there would be anyone interested so I didn't fix it.)
so I just got a counter offer of 2500. It is probably more then I would get in a trade in, but it still bugs me. I know I should counter offer, but what do you counter offer when they take almost 30% off your asking price.
so now I just want to eat yummy things and not work out.
At least I haven't eaten anything, but I can't seem to convince myself to get up and go work out.
so i listed it at 3500 thinking it was work 4k but because of the check engine light being on, and the less then ideal seat and steering wheel, I figured 3500 was fair. I was willing to fix the one tie rod. which I thought would be about 300 (wasn't sure there would be anyone interested so I didn't fix it.)
so I just got a counter offer of 2500. It is probably more then I would get in a trade in, but it still bugs me. I know I should counter offer, but what do you counter offer when they take almost 30% off your asking price.
so now I just want to eat yummy things and not work out.
At least I haven't eaten anything, but I can't seem to convince myself to get up and go work out.
1.26.2010
197.5
too good to last I guess :(
I hope it is just a temporary thing, and tomorrow I'll be back down... a girl can hope
I hope it is just a temporary thing, and tomorrow I'll be back down... a girl can hope
1.25.2010
Selling on Craigslist
Well now this is interesting. The last time I listed my car on CL, I got a couple of people who were interested, but it took a long time to get them.
This time I listed my car and I almost immediately got three replies asking about the car.
Unfortunately two of them were pretty much scams. The first seems legit. He says his wife could be interested, and they want to see it. I reply and nothing back yet - but not unexpected, I have to remember that not everyone lives online :)
Second asks me if the car is still for sale - even though I just listed it 10 minutes ago (ok maybe 30) I reply yes, and he replies that it is very undervalued, and tells me to check a "trade in value" website. Well the website won't give me any info until I tell it what I want to trade it in for, and even then wants all kinds of personal info. Screw that. I reply to the guy asking if he wants the car. His reply is "did I check out the website" and mine to him is if he wants to pay me more then I listed the car for, by all means do and I'll accept it. *rolls eyes*
Third email asks me to double check how much insurance will be on the car. I deleted it with out even replying, because this one too sent a website asking me to check information on that page.
Heck, I'm more then willing to help a customer buy a product, but I'm not about to "check insurance rates" on a car for someone else who hasn't even SEEN the car. That is YOUR responsibility bub.. call an insurance agency. I also figure they want me to email them back so they have my real email addy to spam.
Unfortunately the second guy was clever enough to sound like an actual customer. Hopefully he won't spam the living daylights out of me.
This time I listed my car and I almost immediately got three replies asking about the car.
Unfortunately two of them were pretty much scams. The first seems legit. He says his wife could be interested, and they want to see it. I reply and nothing back yet - but not unexpected, I have to remember that not everyone lives online :)
Second asks me if the car is still for sale - even though I just listed it 10 minutes ago (ok maybe 30) I reply yes, and he replies that it is very undervalued, and tells me to check a "trade in value" website. Well the website won't give me any info until I tell it what I want to trade it in for, and even then wants all kinds of personal info. Screw that. I reply to the guy asking if he wants the car. His reply is "did I check out the website" and mine to him is if he wants to pay me more then I listed the car for, by all means do and I'll accept it. *rolls eyes*
Third email asks me to double check how much insurance will be on the car. I deleted it with out even replying, because this one too sent a website asking me to check information on that page.
Heck, I'm more then willing to help a customer buy a product, but I'm not about to "check insurance rates" on a car for someone else who hasn't even SEEN the car. That is YOUR responsibility bub.. call an insurance agency. I also figure they want me to email them back so they have my real email addy to spam.
Unfortunately the second guy was clever enough to sound like an actual customer. Hopefully he won't spam the living daylights out of me.
196.5
not quite sure I should be typing that, as I can just imagine what is going to happen tomorrow..
But.. that is what the scale told me this morning, so who am I to not shout it from the roof tops??
Ok so you are the only one I've told..
I wasn't all that clean this weekend, eating out a couple of times, but I was conservative and think I did OK (well the scale told me I did) and despite not working out on Friday or Saturday...
But I did work out Sunday.. quite a bit. I ended up doing three hours of cardio for a total burn of over 3000 calories for the day.
But I like this number. Haven't seen anything this low for quite some time..
But.. that is what the scale told me this morning, so who am I to not shout it from the roof tops??
Ok so you are the only one I've told..
I wasn't all that clean this weekend, eating out a couple of times, but I was conservative and think I did OK (well the scale told me I did) and despite not working out on Friday or Saturday...
But I did work out Sunday.. quite a bit. I ended up doing three hours of cardio for a total burn of over 3000 calories for the day.
But I like this number. Haven't seen anything this low for quite some time..
1.24.2010
payback
So in December, I went out to the local Christmas fairs, and bought up all the peanut butter fudge. I bought way more then I should have, but there have been years when I only get one small not the kind I like piece of fudge, so I was happy to find it all. At one point my DH joked that there was probably someone following me around wondering what happened to all the fudge.
Well I guess I am getting my payback now. When I sat down with google to find myself a new car, there was about 10 that I was interested in looking at and 5 or more that I thought would work.
Well most of the ones I was seriously interested in were sold when I showed up at the dealer. The others were either not right or pretty damaged.
*head desk*
So now I'm sitting here considering traveling almost three hours to look at a car that is pushing the budget, or buying one off Ebay sight unseen. I don't much like either option, so my other choice is to fix my current car so it doesn't break on me, and wait it out and hope in the next few months something cool pops up. I don't much like that option either. When I decide I want a different car, I want a different car, and feel like I failed by not finding the right car right away.
Stupid hun? Nothing wrong with having high standards. Wait and it WILL come to me. But why isn't it here waiting for me?
Well I guess I am getting my payback now. When I sat down with google to find myself a new car, there was about 10 that I was interested in looking at and 5 or more that I thought would work.
Well most of the ones I was seriously interested in were sold when I showed up at the dealer. The others were either not right or pretty damaged.
*head desk*
So now I'm sitting here considering traveling almost three hours to look at a car that is pushing the budget, or buying one off Ebay sight unseen. I don't much like either option, so my other choice is to fix my current car so it doesn't break on me, and wait it out and hope in the next few months something cool pops up. I don't much like that option either. When I decide I want a different car, I want a different car, and feel like I failed by not finding the right car right away.
Stupid hun? Nothing wrong with having high standards. Wait and it WILL come to me. But why isn't it here waiting for me?
more dreams
I really must remember that I can only remember two dreams at a time. I had two really interesting dreams the other day, but I kept forgetting to write them down. Then I had another one this morning, and one of the previous dreams disappeared.
The one this morning was about one of my cats. 'F' is a neutered female cat that is about one year old in real life, but in my dream she was pregnant. She was getting ready to give birth, so I put her in the bath tub. I knew she was going to give birth to puppies, so I wanted her to have a lot of room. The bathroom was set up like the bathroom that I grew up in, but the tub was the one I have now. I put in a towel, then filled the tub with water to help her give birth (water birth for a cat??) I realized there was too much water, so I drained some of it out, and she popped out a baby. The baby was covered in mucus, but there was no umbilical cord, nor placenta. Almost immediately the baby was completely dry and fluffy, and it was basically several weeks old, as it was able to jump out of the tub and run around the bathroom. It then jumped back into the tub and cuddled with me. It was white with spots of color. I don't know if it was a cat or a dog.
I started to become concerned about F because she hadn't produced any more babies, and so I ran some more water. The tub completely filled before I realized I wasn't draining as well, so I turned the knob to drain the water. F tried to get comfortable on the small soaked towel that was all bunched up in the corner near the drain. I was thinking about fixing it or giving her a new one, when her vulva opened up and another mucus covered baby popped out. This one was black and white, and reminded me a lot of a stuffed panda. Her vulva remained open, so I peeked in and saw several more babies sitting up and wiggling around. I counted the babies inside, and declared she was going to have nine babies.
um.. OK.. I guess I'm getting kitten fever again ;)
The one that I remember from the other day is I was walking towards a carnival. I seem to dream a lot of carnivals/amusement parks. There were really tall big rides, and in my mind I was walking towards the carnival, but I was walking under these rides. The field I was walking in was surrounded by a gully that was filled with water. When I tried to jump over the gully I fell in. The gully was filled with cabbages, and they stuck to me very much like burrs would. I climbed out of the gully and started pulling large cabbages off of me.
cabbages? really? my brain is so interesting sometimes.
while typing out that one I did remember the other dream. I was moving into an apartment with some other people. We were trying to figure out who was going to take which room. We looked around, and opened up a closet type room and saw a washer and drier. I was glad to see we had a washer, and went further into the room. Turns out that the room was much larger then it seemed, and I thought it would be nice to put a sitting area in the back half of the room. I walked back there to see what might fit, and I realized there was a door back there. I opened the door, and there was another room and I decided I wanted that room. All of a sudden the empty room was lived in, and it had french doors that led outside to a well established garden. In the room was two pelicans. They were very large, and insisted on going outside. They flew outside, and grabbed two rather large kohlrabi from the garden, and then flew back inside (flew meaning half flying and half walking) and hunkered down in the living area to eat them. The living area was covered in sand, and it was intentional - almost as if trying to mimic the beach for the pelicans. But why they were eating (and how as pelicans can't bite off pieces in RL but in my dream they were) kohlrabi I have no idea.
My dreams are pretty interesting that is for certain
room washing machines pelekins rutabagas
The one this morning was about one of my cats. 'F' is a neutered female cat that is about one year old in real life, but in my dream she was pregnant. She was getting ready to give birth, so I put her in the bath tub. I knew she was going to give birth to puppies, so I wanted her to have a lot of room. The bathroom was set up like the bathroom that I grew up in, but the tub was the one I have now. I put in a towel, then filled the tub with water to help her give birth (water birth for a cat??) I realized there was too much water, so I drained some of it out, and she popped out a baby. The baby was covered in mucus, but there was no umbilical cord, nor placenta. Almost immediately the baby was completely dry and fluffy, and it was basically several weeks old, as it was able to jump out of the tub and run around the bathroom. It then jumped back into the tub and cuddled with me. It was white with spots of color. I don't know if it was a cat or a dog.
I started to become concerned about F because she hadn't produced any more babies, and so I ran some more water. The tub completely filled before I realized I wasn't draining as well, so I turned the knob to drain the water. F tried to get comfortable on the small soaked towel that was all bunched up in the corner near the drain. I was thinking about fixing it or giving her a new one, when her vulva opened up and another mucus covered baby popped out. This one was black and white, and reminded me a lot of a stuffed panda. Her vulva remained open, so I peeked in and saw several more babies sitting up and wiggling around. I counted the babies inside, and declared she was going to have nine babies.
um.. OK.. I guess I'm getting kitten fever again ;)
The one that I remember from the other day is I was walking towards a carnival. I seem to dream a lot of carnivals/amusement parks. There were really tall big rides, and in my mind I was walking towards the carnival, but I was walking under these rides. The field I was walking in was surrounded by a gully that was filled with water. When I tried to jump over the gully I fell in. The gully was filled with cabbages, and they stuck to me very much like burrs would. I climbed out of the gully and started pulling large cabbages off of me.
cabbages? really? my brain is so interesting sometimes.
while typing out that one I did remember the other dream. I was moving into an apartment with some other people. We were trying to figure out who was going to take which room. We looked around, and opened up a closet type room and saw a washer and drier. I was glad to see we had a washer, and went further into the room. Turns out that the room was much larger then it seemed, and I thought it would be nice to put a sitting area in the back half of the room. I walked back there to see what might fit, and I realized there was a door back there. I opened the door, and there was another room and I decided I wanted that room. All of a sudden the empty room was lived in, and it had french doors that led outside to a well established garden. In the room was two pelicans. They were very large, and insisted on going outside. They flew outside, and grabbed two rather large kohlrabi from the garden, and then flew back inside (flew meaning half flying and half walking) and hunkered down in the living area to eat them. The living area was covered in sand, and it was intentional - almost as if trying to mimic the beach for the pelicans. But why they were eating (and how as pelicans can't bite off pieces in RL but in my dream they were) kohlrabi I have no idea.
My dreams are pretty interesting that is for certain
room washing machines pelekins rutabagas
1.21.2010
197.5??
and I failed to mention that the evil lying scale decided to freak me out again. there was that jump down to 199, then shortly after I jumped down to 197.5. I've been there a week or so.
Monday I had little to do but lay in bed and try to stay warm, so I exercised quite a bit and ended up burning over 1000 calories more then I took in. As a "thank you" my scale decided to tell me I weighed 199.
I rolled my eyes, and the next day I was down to 197.5 again.
But what really gets me... what is so friggen confusing, is the old scale says I still weigh 203!! These two scales work in tandem to confuse me. Some days one is lower then the other, and it is never the same, sometimes the old, sometimes the new.. and sometimes they weigh exactly the same!
But my loose pants became floppy butt pants, and I thought I had put on my good fitting jeans and they were a little tight, but I had put on my tight fitting jeans and they were only a little tight, so I think my body is finally coming around.
I still have no idea if I am going to continue with the depo when it is due in a few weeks. I guess if I have lost more weight before then I will, but if I'm still stuck at or above 197 I wont.
but then what will I do for birth control??
Monday I had little to do but lay in bed and try to stay warm, so I exercised quite a bit and ended up burning over 1000 calories more then I took in. As a "thank you" my scale decided to tell me I weighed 199.
I rolled my eyes, and the next day I was down to 197.5 again.
But what really gets me... what is so friggen confusing, is the old scale says I still weigh 203!! These two scales work in tandem to confuse me. Some days one is lower then the other, and it is never the same, sometimes the old, sometimes the new.. and sometimes they weigh exactly the same!
But my loose pants became floppy butt pants, and I thought I had put on my good fitting jeans and they were a little tight, but I had put on my tight fitting jeans and they were only a little tight, so I think my body is finally coming around.
I still have no idea if I am going to continue with the depo when it is due in a few weeks. I guess if I have lost more weight before then I will, but if I'm still stuck at or above 197 I wont.
but then what will I do for birth control??
Apparently...
I am either supposed to be hozed right now, or this is just the way station for *opportunity*
Went out looking at cars last Saturday, and found another Volvo that worked very well. I had a few other cars to look at that day, so I left knowing that car had been on the lot since November I figured it would last one more day.
Sunday I called in the AM and told them I wanted to put a deposit down on the car. Gave them my name, my credit card info and my phone number!! I was planning on going down early in the week and get it to a mechanic to take a once over on it. Well Sunday we were without heat so I didn't do much of anything. Monday we were in the middle of a snow storm, no electricity at work, so I had the day off but I wasn't going anywhere because I was waiting for the oil guy to show up so we could turn the heat back on (we were dangerously low on oil and running out is not good for the furnace, so better to be with out then to run out) and then once the heat was on, and the snow stopped, it still was not good driving, so I just hunkered down.
Tuesday I told everyone about my car, and realized that I wouldn't be able to get down to deal with buying the car until Friday, so I thought I should call them and let them know.
So they tell me they SOLD MY CAR! Say what?? I put a deposit down on it, it was mine!! so the stupid sales guy said he would look into it and call me back.
I ran to my computer, and no deposit was put on my card, which did not bode well for me, but I was ready to make them void that sale.
So now stupid sales guy calls me back and asks me if my name was Matt. Um.. No.. I'm a girl! (stupid sales guy) he said well Matt came in on "Saturday" and bought the car. Yea.. ok.. Saturday.. sure. So stupid phone answering guy didn't think to check to see if the car was still available when he took my information? I'm not sure I buy that. But I suppose I COULD see it happening.
But I bet you anything the stupid phone answering guy didn't take the car off as available, and it sold before could run my card. I still technically think I could make a huge stink and get the car, but what are the odds?
and I am not even 100% sure I wanted the car, as I wanted it to be inspected by an outside source before I bought it... so I make the stink then there are things wrong with it??
But what pisses me off most of all. What really makes me want to tell you all the name of this car dealership so that no one ever does business with it and it goes out of business (like what happened when I bought my Eclipse Spider - I thought it was quite humorous that when you googled the name of the car dealership that sold me that car my blog came up saying how much they stunk at customer service) is that THEY HAD MY PHONE NUMBER!! So since Sunday the car was sold, but I had offered to put a deposit on it and when someone does that they think they are buying a car for goodness sake!! So no one called me on Sunday. Apparently stupid phone guy didn't think it important. My stupid sales person didn't call me on Monday.. nor on Tuesday, they made me call back to find out I didn't have a car!!
I mean who does that? Takes your credit card info and phone number then just throws it out? (man I hope he threw it out / destroyed it and it isn't in the pocket of stupid people)
I hate.. HATE.. failure to be a f@ckin human..
But I'm not going to mention them because frankly I want this to be an anonymous blog and that would ruin it..
But it would be so nice to see them deal with it..
So now I need to find another car.. or I need to get mine fixed. I have a few to look at this weekend. If nothing pops up, and the two auctions for Benzs go above my budget (which they probably will), I'll just fix my car and deal with it. I suppose that is ok, since I won't have to register a new more expensive car, nor pay taxes on it, etc.
Went out looking at cars last Saturday, and found another Volvo that worked very well. I had a few other cars to look at that day, so I left knowing that car had been on the lot since November I figured it would last one more day.
Sunday I called in the AM and told them I wanted to put a deposit down on the car. Gave them my name, my credit card info and my phone number!! I was planning on going down early in the week and get it to a mechanic to take a once over on it. Well Sunday we were without heat so I didn't do much of anything. Monday we were in the middle of a snow storm, no electricity at work, so I had the day off but I wasn't going anywhere because I was waiting for the oil guy to show up so we could turn the heat back on (we were dangerously low on oil and running out is not good for the furnace, so better to be with out then to run out) and then once the heat was on, and the snow stopped, it still was not good driving, so I just hunkered down.
Tuesday I told everyone about my car, and realized that I wouldn't be able to get down to deal with buying the car until Friday, so I thought I should call them and let them know.
So they tell me they SOLD MY CAR! Say what?? I put a deposit down on it, it was mine!! so the stupid sales guy said he would look into it and call me back.
I ran to my computer, and no deposit was put on my card, which did not bode well for me, but I was ready to make them void that sale.
So now stupid sales guy calls me back and asks me if my name was Matt. Um.. No.. I'm a girl! (stupid sales guy) he said well Matt came in on "Saturday" and bought the car. Yea.. ok.. Saturday.. sure. So stupid phone answering guy didn't think to check to see if the car was still available when he took my information? I'm not sure I buy that. But I suppose I COULD see it happening.
But I bet you anything the stupid phone answering guy didn't take the car off as available, and it sold before could run my card. I still technically think I could make a huge stink and get the car, but what are the odds?
and I am not even 100% sure I wanted the car, as I wanted it to be inspected by an outside source before I bought it... so I make the stink then there are things wrong with it??
But what pisses me off most of all. What really makes me want to tell you all the name of this car dealership so that no one ever does business with it and it goes out of business (like what happened when I bought my Eclipse Spider - I thought it was quite humorous that when you googled the name of the car dealership that sold me that car my blog came up saying how much they stunk at customer service) is that THEY HAD MY PHONE NUMBER!! So since Sunday the car was sold, but I had offered to put a deposit on it and when someone does that they think they are buying a car for goodness sake!! So no one called me on Sunday. Apparently stupid phone guy didn't think it important. My stupid sales person didn't call me on Monday.. nor on Tuesday, they made me call back to find out I didn't have a car!!
I mean who does that? Takes your credit card info and phone number then just throws it out? (man I hope he threw it out / destroyed it and it isn't in the pocket of stupid people)
I hate.. HATE.. failure to be a f@ckin human..
But I'm not going to mention them because frankly I want this to be an anonymous blog and that would ruin it..
But it would be so nice to see them deal with it..
So now I need to find another car.. or I need to get mine fixed. I have a few to look at this weekend. If nothing pops up, and the two auctions for Benzs go above my budget (which they probably will), I'll just fix my car and deal with it. I suppose that is ok, since I won't have to register a new more expensive car, nor pay taxes on it, etc.
1.14.2010
weird dreams
Ok, so I guess I am going to believe my scale. It has been reading 199 for three days now. Not quite sure what is going on, but I'm not going to care about it too much.
DH has become sick. I HATE when he is sick. I want to run away and not deal with him till he is better. He becomes very whiney and pathetic, and can't ask for anything he needs, but whines about it and pussy foots around the subject until I finally figure out what he's on about and it just makes me want to hit him. Damn it man, if you want me to get you a drink JUST ASK!!
so he's coughing and pathetic and he offered to sleep on the couch (cause he sleeps just fine on the couch, and I do not) and I took him up on it because I have been very fatigued lately. So much so that I decided to do only half a work out and go right off to bed. Sadly I got NO sleep. I was on the verge of it for several hours, then finally went off, and had a stupid dream that I was in a home with my sister and her two boys. No home I recognize, and I didn't recognize my sister nor her boys either but I knew I was related to them. I bitched at the boys for never acknowledging gifts given to them (which is totally true in real life - my sister never made them send thank yous, and she almost never called me to tell me they showed up) The oldest just sat there and looked at me with a blank look on his face. I continued to bitch that after all I had given him, the least he could do is help me out with my son (apparently I had given birth recently and had a new born - *shudder*) again another blank look. My sister came up and told me to lay off the boys, and we started arguing. I told her I needed help and it would be nice if she could do SOMETHING, and she started going off on me. This is when I realized my sister instead of being the pasty white blond chick I grew up with in RL was actually a Hispanic chica (yes, totally stereotypical, my apologies to the Hispanic community, but they exist in RL and that is what she was in my dream) Short dark pin curl hair, gold jewelery everywhere, and over sized baggy clothing including a red sweatshirt. Finally I couldn't take her crap any more, and I hauled off and hit her.
so I woke up. Realized the bed was covered in cats, I was uncomfortable so I got up and went pee, got back in bed, got covered in cats again, and went back to sleep.
This time I was flying to Europe with my parents. Why? no idea, but it was a last minute almost an emergency type of trip. They sailed right through the check in, and I couldn't find my past port. I thought I left it in the car, but then I realized I *DID* have my purse with me, and it was in there. I pulled it out and cleared through, but had almost no time to make my flight. A guy offered to show me a short cut through the airport, and i followed him. First through a "health inspection" area, which was much like a gym changing room (changing rooms pop up a LOT in my dreams now that I think about it) Once I entered this room, there were several men and women milling about. One larger man was dressed up as a large purple grape. yes a large purple grape at an airport. Don't ask. So I worked my way through the maze that was the inspection station - and with the help of the guy didn't have to be inspected. He then brought me through a busy food court type area. He then went directly to a large hot chocolate machine. One side was chocolate, the other white chocolate. He laid down on the ground, and rolled at the white chocolate side, and a trap door let him under the machine. HE called for me to follow but I refused. I stood there like an idiot saying I'd just have to miss my flight and catch the next one.
Finally I woke up, and it was still pretty early in the evening. I figured I was stressing, so I went into the kitchen and had some carbs. a pack of cupcakes and a slice of bread, and a glass of crystal light. One of my cats had a lot to say about getting some of my snack - he's a carb fiend.. I put the TV on to distract my brain because it was rattling on about *very important things* which I can't remember any of it now.
I had a third dream about 3am. and sadly I can't remember what it is. But it too woke me up. I got up and went pee again, and tricked all of the cats that were on me when I woke up to follow me down the hall and then I shut the door to the bedroom, because five + cats wrapped around my body leads to body aches. Even still there were three left (fortunately the small cats) and I got a couple more hours of sleep.
But this is NOT helping my exhaustion. Hopefully my supplements will kick in soon
DH has become sick. I HATE when he is sick. I want to run away and not deal with him till he is better. He becomes very whiney and pathetic, and can't ask for anything he needs, but whines about it and pussy foots around the subject until I finally figure out what he's on about and it just makes me want to hit him. Damn it man, if you want me to get you a drink JUST ASK!!
so he's coughing and pathetic and he offered to sleep on the couch (cause he sleeps just fine on the couch, and I do not) and I took him up on it because I have been very fatigued lately. So much so that I decided to do only half a work out and go right off to bed. Sadly I got NO sleep. I was on the verge of it for several hours, then finally went off, and had a stupid dream that I was in a home with my sister and her two boys. No home I recognize, and I didn't recognize my sister nor her boys either but I knew I was related to them. I bitched at the boys for never acknowledging gifts given to them (which is totally true in real life - my sister never made them send thank yous, and she almost never called me to tell me they showed up) The oldest just sat there and looked at me with a blank look on his face. I continued to bitch that after all I had given him, the least he could do is help me out with my son (apparently I had given birth recently and had a new born - *shudder*) again another blank look. My sister came up and told me to lay off the boys, and we started arguing. I told her I needed help and it would be nice if she could do SOMETHING, and she started going off on me. This is when I realized my sister instead of being the pasty white blond chick I grew up with in RL was actually a Hispanic chica (yes, totally stereotypical, my apologies to the Hispanic community, but they exist in RL and that is what she was in my dream) Short dark pin curl hair, gold jewelery everywhere, and over sized baggy clothing including a red sweatshirt. Finally I couldn't take her crap any more, and I hauled off and hit her.
so I woke up. Realized the bed was covered in cats, I was uncomfortable so I got up and went pee, got back in bed, got covered in cats again, and went back to sleep.
This time I was flying to Europe with my parents. Why? no idea, but it was a last minute almost an emergency type of trip. They sailed right through the check in, and I couldn't find my past port. I thought I left it in the car, but then I realized I *DID* have my purse with me, and it was in there. I pulled it out and cleared through, but had almost no time to make my flight. A guy offered to show me a short cut through the airport, and i followed him. First through a "health inspection" area, which was much like a gym changing room (changing rooms pop up a LOT in my dreams now that I think about it) Once I entered this room, there were several men and women milling about. One larger man was dressed up as a large purple grape. yes a large purple grape at an airport. Don't ask. So I worked my way through the maze that was the inspection station - and with the help of the guy didn't have to be inspected. He then brought me through a busy food court type area. He then went directly to a large hot chocolate machine. One side was chocolate, the other white chocolate. He laid down on the ground, and rolled at the white chocolate side, and a trap door let him under the machine. HE called for me to follow but I refused. I stood there like an idiot saying I'd just have to miss my flight and catch the next one.
Finally I woke up, and it was still pretty early in the evening. I figured I was stressing, so I went into the kitchen and had some carbs. a pack of cupcakes and a slice of bread, and a glass of crystal light. One of my cats had a lot to say about getting some of my snack - he's a carb fiend.. I put the TV on to distract my brain because it was rattling on about *very important things* which I can't remember any of it now.
I had a third dream about 3am. and sadly I can't remember what it is. But it too woke me up. I got up and went pee again, and tricked all of the cats that were on me when I woke up to follow me down the hall and then I shut the door to the bedroom, because five + cats wrapped around my body leads to body aches. Even still there were three left (fortunately the small cats) and I got a couple more hours of sleep.
But this is NOT helping my exhaustion. Hopefully my supplements will kick in soon
1.12.2010
and as for the car...
yea, I'm totally hosed on that one.
There is a list of things that need fixing on it. Something to do with the air conditioning ($300) something to do with my steering ($100-200) and something to do with my engine ($$$$$$$$)
To remain drivable, I should fix the steering thing. The engine is more of a "it would run way better if you fixed this" thing, not that it will stop running if I don't. and the air conditioning thing... well if I get one month of summer I'm lucky and I own a convertible, so what do I care about A/C? there were two days it would have been nice if it had worked last year.. because I was on the highway going to a meeting..
So I can either fix the old crappy car (that I like) or invest in a new used car. I've been looking and found a benz that I almost actually started drooling over. I've got a list of cars to go look at. I'm thinking it might be in my best interest to buy a different car now while I still have a car that runs to trade in then to wait till it falls apart and I need to buy a new car NOW!!! and I have nothing to trade in.
but I'll look, I'll bide my time. I'll see what is out there, and hopefullythat benz is as sexy in person and such a good deal that I can't not buy it.. I'll find a good deal.
There is a list of things that need fixing on it. Something to do with the air conditioning ($300) something to do with my steering ($100-200) and something to do with my engine ($$$$$$$$)
To remain drivable, I should fix the steering thing. The engine is more of a "it would run way better if you fixed this" thing, not that it will stop running if I don't. and the air conditioning thing... well if I get one month of summer I'm lucky and I own a convertible, so what do I care about A/C? there were two days it would have been nice if it had worked last year.. because I was on the highway going to a meeting..
So I can either fix the old crappy car (that I like) or invest in a new used car. I've been looking and found a benz that I almost actually started drooling over. I've got a list of cars to go look at. I'm thinking it might be in my best interest to buy a different car now while I still have a car that runs to trade in then to wait till it falls apart and I need to buy a new car NOW!!! and I have nothing to trade in.
but I'll look, I'll bide my time. I'll see what is out there, and hopefully
more and less trouble
a follow up to my trouble posts.. :)
I did go out and buy the lemon cupcakes.. I was bad, I admit it.. but I know that I CAN fit yummy goodness into my diet and still be healthy if I am careful.
Well I bought pink cupcakes at the same time (they say strawberry but we all know they are just pink flavored.. and if you have to ask what pink flavored is, then I feel a little bit sorry for you and a little bit proud of you at the same time) as a back up. I feared lemoney goodness couldn't possibly live up to my dream..
and they didn't. They were yellow flavored.. which frankly is quite gross.
but it didn't stop me from eating two packages of them before thrusting them upon my DH and tell him to hide them.
My thyroid support supplement came in yesterday. I'm looking forward to having a bit of energy back.
I did go out and buy the lemon cupcakes.. I was bad, I admit it.. but I know that I CAN fit yummy goodness into my diet and still be healthy if I am careful.
Well I bought pink cupcakes at the same time (they say strawberry but we all know they are just pink flavored.. and if you have to ask what pink flavored is, then I feel a little bit sorry for you and a little bit proud of you at the same time) as a back up. I feared lemoney goodness couldn't possibly live up to my dream..
and they didn't. They were yellow flavored.. which frankly is quite gross.
but it didn't stop me from eating two packages of them before thrusting them upon my DH and tell him to hide them.
My thyroid support supplement came in yesterday. I'm looking forward to having a bit of energy back.
Did I mention my scale is evil?
I'm sure I did. and I'm sure I mentioned that is why I bought a second scale so that when one was being nasty to me, I would have a back up. Well the back up is nasty too. Scales are just evil.
So I blogged that I had a bad weekend, and ended up eating 700 more calories then I normally do, and about 200 more then I burned off (thank you GoWear Fit) Well I realized it was actually 300, but still far short of the 1050 calories I needed to eat to actually gain the 3 lbs I put on.
So I was good, I drank my water, etc. So Sunday my scale said 206.5. Pshaw. So what.
Monday it said 200. Um.. what? I knew that really couldn't be true, so I stepped on the old scale and it said 206. Now the new scale is the one that told me recently I weighed 187.. so I just wrote it off to it was being evil.
Well this morning it said 199!!! say what?? the old scale said 205. So I lost the pound, but what is with the others??
I so want to believe the new scale.. I really do.
But I must remember not to tie my happiness/self esteem/dieting success to my scale. Because my scales are EVIL! (ok so they aren't evil, but they are little pranksters in the 10th degree) I must take my success in what I am eating and that I am exercising.
But I so want that scale to be right..
So I blogged that I had a bad weekend, and ended up eating 700 more calories then I normally do, and about 200 more then I burned off (thank you GoWear Fit) Well I realized it was actually 300, but still far short of the 1050 calories I needed to eat to actually gain the 3 lbs I put on.
So I was good, I drank my water, etc. So Sunday my scale said 206.5. Pshaw. So what.
Monday it said 200. Um.. what? I knew that really couldn't be true, so I stepped on the old scale and it said 206. Now the new scale is the one that told me recently I weighed 187.. so I just wrote it off to it was being evil.
Well this morning it said 199!!! say what?? the old scale said 205. So I lost the pound, but what is with the others??
I so want to believe the new scale.. I really do.
But I must remember not to tie my happiness/self esteem/dieting success to my scale. Because my scales are EVIL! (ok so they aren't evil, but they are little pranksters in the 10th degree) I must take my success in what I am eating and that I am exercising.
But I so want that scale to be right..
1.10.2010
new car?
So I let the smoke out of my car the other day, and it took almost $800 to fix. While the mechanic was in there fixing it, he noticed another problem that is going to cost $300 to fix. Trying to figure out what to do, I thought it might not be a bad idea to invest in a good inspection of everything and see if this is everything that needs to be fixed, or if there is something else about to break too.
If it is just this second problem I'm going to fix it, and move on. If there are a few other things I'm going to just buy a "new" car.
So in prep I thought I'd head over to Ebay and see what's for sale. I prefer convertibles, and I know the lots around me have been very empty so finding a local convertible will be tricky. I like my current car, so I searched for those, and found several that made me drool. The new ones have a hard top convertible. How freaky cool are those??!!! But I don't have a spare $30K to get one of those. There were a few that would work nicely, but they are out in Ohio or Florida. Makes DH very happy as he so enjoys a road trip.
So I made a few bids on cars that have very low starting bids and higher reserves.. and I got a little too into it. Must remember I'm not doing anything until after I get my car inspected on Monday.
If it is just this second problem I'm going to fix it, and move on. If there are a few other things I'm going to just buy a "new" car.
So in prep I thought I'd head over to Ebay and see what's for sale. I prefer convertibles, and I know the lots around me have been very empty so finding a local convertible will be tricky. I like my current car, so I searched for those, and found several that made me drool. The new ones have a hard top convertible. How freaky cool are those??!!! But I don't have a spare $30K to get one of those. There were a few that would work nicely, but they are out in Ohio or Florida. Makes DH very happy as he so enjoys a road trip.
So I made a few bids on cars that have very low starting bids and higher reserves.. and I got a little too into it. Must remember I'm not doing anything until after I get my car inspected on Monday.
grrr
well I couldn't stop eating this weekend. We went over to a friend's house and i had two and a half pieces of pizza and dorritos. Then Sat I ate over 2000 calories but did not move out of bed, so for the first time in a long time I actually ate more calories then I burned off (I burned 1800 calories)
I'm tired and cranky so I'm just going to go with this for a short while. I'm on plan at the moment, but it is only 11am, so I can only hope it continues.
BUT (and here the grrr part comes in)
I put on 3 lbs.
scale said 206.5 this morning. Now on Friday I only burned 200 calories (normally I burn 600 calories) and Saturday I was 200 calories over.. so why the three pounds???
*sigh*
Oh well. One meal at a time right? I should make sure I take comfort in the fact that I'm generally eating well and taking care of myself. and let the scale say what ever lie it wants to.
I'm tired and cranky so I'm just going to go with this for a short while. I'm on plan at the moment, but it is only 11am, so I can only hope it continues.
BUT (and here the grrr part comes in)
I put on 3 lbs.
scale said 206.5 this morning. Now on Friday I only burned 200 calories (normally I burn 600 calories) and Saturday I was 200 calories over.. so why the three pounds???
*sigh*
Oh well. One meal at a time right? I should make sure I take comfort in the fact that I'm generally eating well and taking care of myself. and let the scale say what ever lie it wants to.
1.07.2010
more trouble
well crud.
I am so incredibly tired it isn't even funny.
In the past I was so exhausted I went and saw a Dr. Dr. had NOTHING for me. Sent me to another Dr. This Dr. had NOTHING for me. So I bought Thyroid support supplement. I started getting energy. I forgot how tired I was. when the first bottle ran out I bought another one. I was with out them for a few days, and I was ok. Well this time when I ran out I didn't order more.
big problem. I'm barely functioning at 2pm. I want a cookie to try to boost my energy but at least I understand that it won't. I might be a bit more awake for 2 minutes, but I'll crash. So Im now drinking a caffeinated beverage. I hate doing that.
Thyroid support supplement should be in tonight or tomorrow. I can't wait.
Till then, anyone got any toothpicks for my eyeballs?
I am so incredibly tired it isn't even funny.
In the past I was so exhausted I went and saw a Dr. Dr. had NOTHING for me. Sent me to another Dr. This Dr. had NOTHING for me. So I bought Thyroid support supplement. I started getting energy. I forgot how tired I was. when the first bottle ran out I bought another one. I was with out them for a few days, and I was ok. Well this time when I ran out I didn't order more.
big problem. I'm barely functioning at 2pm. I want a cookie to try to boost my energy but at least I understand that it won't. I might be a bit more awake for 2 minutes, but I'll crash. So Im now drinking a caffeinated beverage. I hate doing that.
Thyroid support supplement should be in tonight or tomorrow. I can't wait.
Till then, anyone got any toothpicks for my eyeballs?
I'm in trouble..
So I have now burned 2800 calories. You'd think I'd be down to 203 not still stuck at 203.5 but noooooo.. grump grump grump.
and what do I spy as I'm sitting here hungry waiting for some time to pass before eating lunch (or I'll be dead starving in the middle of the day) but new Hostess 100 calorie cupcakes in LEMON!!
arrgh
I can't seem to convince myself they are not editable. Nor could they possibly have a nice strong yummy lemon flavor.. all I can think of is I have to go out and get them.
Did I mention I was in trouble?
and what do I spy as I'm sitting here hungry waiting for some time to pass before eating lunch (or I'll be dead starving in the middle of the day) but new Hostess 100 calorie cupcakes in LEMON!!
arrgh
I can't seem to convince myself they are not editable. Nor could they possibly have a nice strong yummy lemon flavor.. all I can think of is I have to go out and get them.
Did I mention I was in trouble?
1.06.2010
1.05.2010
ticker
So I figured it out :) I like it. Now I think I'm going to reconfigure my layout so it can be on permanently..
Update.. Well that was fun :) Not quite sure the ticker accurate reflects my goal, but it is set up to monitor when I've burned enough calories to lose 5 lbs.
Update.. Well that was fun :) Not quite sure the ticker accurate reflects my goal, but it is set up to monitor when I've burned enough calories to lose 5 lbs.
203.5
ha ha ha.. scale, very funny. (stupid scale)
So as I said I weighed in over the holidays, and hadn't gained any weight, so I figured I'd be a little less cautious with my diet and ate well. So around the new year I weighed in at 206.5 I started being more careful with my diet on Sunday and figured I'd officially start back up on Monday. Sunday I was good calorie wise eating 1643 calories and having a net calorie for the day (thanks to my GoWear Fit) of -457. Now granted I had pasta and meatballs (turkey) and cheesecake (mmmmm.. cheesecake) on Sunday, but all the experts agree it isn't so much what you eat but how much. So when on Monday I weighed 206.5 I just threw my hands up and started from that point.
Yesterday I ate a total of 1545 calories and had a net for the day of -930 and this morning I weighed 203.5 So either my scale is being evil again (which I do not doubt in the least) or it really does matter if you eat cheesecake (mmmm... cheesecake) :D
So now officially I have gained 1.5 pounds over the holiday. Since my body can do that just for the fun of it, I have determined that my fat cells are in on it with my scale. (yes, I know I'm being silly)
I have resigned myself to the fact that this is not my fault, but something I have to work with. I am fighting the forces of evil, one piece of kale at a time. (ooh.. what a nice name for a blog.. lol)
I'm tempted to keep a running total of my calorie deficit and see where I end up, but I know full well that it will not correspond with any weight loss because I've had months of negative calorie days and it was not as cut and dry as "hit -3500 and be down one pound"
Might be fun to see though..
So as I said I weighed in over the holidays, and hadn't gained any weight, so I figured I'd be a little less cautious with my diet and ate well. So around the new year I weighed in at 206.5 I started being more careful with my diet on Sunday and figured I'd officially start back up on Monday. Sunday I was good calorie wise eating 1643 calories and having a net calorie for the day (thanks to my GoWear Fit) of -457. Now granted I had pasta and meatballs (turkey) and cheesecake (mmmmm.. cheesecake) on Sunday, but all the experts agree it isn't so much what you eat but how much. So when on Monday I weighed 206.5 I just threw my hands up and started from that point.
Yesterday I ate a total of 1545 calories and had a net for the day of -930 and this morning I weighed 203.5 So either my scale is being evil again (which I do not doubt in the least) or it really does matter if you eat cheesecake (mmmm... cheesecake) :D
So now officially I have gained 1.5 pounds over the holiday. Since my body can do that just for the fun of it, I have determined that my fat cells are in on it with my scale. (yes, I know I'm being silly)
I have resigned myself to the fact that this is not my fault, but something I have to work with. I am fighting the forces of evil, one piece of kale at a time. (ooh.. what a nice name for a blog.. lol)
I'm tempted to keep a running total of my calorie deficit and see where I end up, but I know full well that it will not correspond with any weight loss because I've had months of negative calorie days and it was not as cut and dry as "hit -3500 and be down one pound"
Might be fun to see though..
Liberté Méditerranée yogurt - Lemon
OMG.. I am so in love with a yogurt..
I would have preferred it be just a bit more lemon-ish, but it was by far one of the best yogurts I have ever eaten.
Although for 250 calories for a regular size cup of yogurt it very well should have been!!
It was nice and creamy with just a nice bite of the sour of yogurt that you would expect. The lemon was - well as i said it could have been a little stronger for my tastes - a really nice addition and complemented the yogurt very well. The is some "fruit on the bottom" which to me was a tad too sweet (ok yes, I like my lemon flavored foods to bite back)
I probably won't be buying again any time soon - due to the 250 calories and the just shy of perfect lemon taste, but was quite pleased with the container I bought.
I would have preferred it be just a bit more lemon-ish, but it was by far one of the best yogurts I have ever eaten.
Although for 250 calories for a regular size cup of yogurt it very well should have been!!
It was nice and creamy with just a nice bite of the sour of yogurt that you would expect. The lemon was - well as i said it could have been a little stronger for my tastes - a really nice addition and complemented the yogurt very well. The is some "fruit on the bottom" which to me was a tad too sweet (ok yes, I like my lemon flavored foods to bite back)
I probably won't be buying again any time soon - due to the 250 calories and the just shy of perfect lemon taste, but was quite pleased with the container I bought.
1.04.2010
206.5
guess I went a little overboard after my last post and saw I wasn't gaining weight even though I wasn't following my diet very well. Guess I was following it better then I thought I was.
but now the goodies are (mostly) gone from the house, and I am going to get back on track. My next depo shot is due the second week of February, so I need to decide between now and then if I am going to get it. The last two times I actually lost weight were times I was severely behind on getting my depo shot, so I am starting to believe that a lot of my health issues stem from the fact that I've been on that for .. what fifteen years now?
But I can not fathom getting my period back after such a long time. I HATED my period. passionately. So much so I was very close to ripping out my own uterus with my bare hands.
What is it worth to me to lose the weight?
Here's my thinking, I am going to give dieting one more good try, and if I am unsuccessful at getting under 200lbs (by a nice margin) I am going to talk to a plastic surgeon about liposuction and depo. See what the expert has to say about the matter then make my decision.
I do know that my body will never lose a few lumps of fat deposits. I know my arms are going to have to be manually removed, and I'm fairly certain my thighs will as well (I have a fold in one of my thighs - and I've had it since I was 150lbs, so it is just the way I was built) My arms and my thighs impede my ability to buy clothing that fits properly. My "muffin top" above my belly button just ticks me off.
I don't want to be Kate Moss. I just want life to be a little easier. I don't want to feel the jiggle on my arms and I don't want to have to buy only stretchy tops because those are the only things that fit over my arms with out being two sizes too big for my torso. Pants are another big issue as my thighs are wider around then my hips. I'd like to be able to give up the thought that I am the largest one in the room. I would like to no longer even think about that - which is hard to do when my thighs are bursting out of my pants. I would like slimming shape ware to actually slim me, and not make me feel like a sausage.
I can, and will, eat right and exercise every day. What my body does next will determine what it has to suffer through.
but now the goodies are (mostly) gone from the house, and I am going to get back on track. My next depo shot is due the second week of February, so I need to decide between now and then if I am going to get it. The last two times I actually lost weight were times I was severely behind on getting my depo shot, so I am starting to believe that a lot of my health issues stem from the fact that I've been on that for .. what fifteen years now?
But I can not fathom getting my period back after such a long time. I HATED my period. passionately. So much so I was very close to ripping out my own uterus with my bare hands.
What is it worth to me to lose the weight?
Here's my thinking, I am going to give dieting one more good try, and if I am unsuccessful at getting under 200lbs (by a nice margin) I am going to talk to a plastic surgeon about liposuction and depo. See what the expert has to say about the matter then make my decision.
I do know that my body will never lose a few lumps of fat deposits. I know my arms are going to have to be manually removed, and I'm fairly certain my thighs will as well (I have a fold in one of my thighs - and I've had it since I was 150lbs, so it is just the way I was built) My arms and my thighs impede my ability to buy clothing that fits properly. My "muffin top" above my belly button just ticks me off.
I don't want to be Kate Moss. I just want life to be a little easier. I don't want to feel the jiggle on my arms and I don't want to have to buy only stretchy tops because those are the only things that fit over my arms with out being two sizes too big for my torso. Pants are another big issue as my thighs are wider around then my hips. I'd like to be able to give up the thought that I am the largest one in the room. I would like to no longer even think about that - which is hard to do when my thighs are bursting out of my pants. I would like slimming shape ware to actually slim me, and not make me feel like a sausage.
I can, and will, eat right and exercise every day. What my body does next will determine what it has to suffer through.
Amused
“Often we don't listen to who we're meant to be because we're so busy trying to live out someone else's ideas. But other people and their opinions hold no power in defining our destiny.”
— Oprah
I found this quite amusing. The reason being is I watched the Today show this morning and saw the segment on Robyn Okrant and her book "Living Oprah" and how she spent an entire year living by and buying everything that Oprah said we should have/do/etc
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